blogging. then, now… etc. general randomness

I’ve had this blog for quite a while now… since january of 08. that’s crazy. I remember when I first heard about blogs and I didn’t know what the heck a ‘blog’ was. I almost swore them off entirely because of the name. I’m sure I’ve posted before about my weird inability to get past the names of things or how I don’t like the way certain words sound or (my biggest challenge) when words or names don’t make sense to me. example: I have nothing at all against those lacy things that my grandma used to make and stick under lamps on end tables or over the back of my grandpa’s chair so his hair product wouldn’t stain the upholstery. you know what I’m talking about… but I HATE the word “doily”. I think it sounds like the absolute stupidest word in the english language. how can you say it without sounding like (or feeling like) a complete idiot?!? I had an ongoing argument with a friend in high school over which was the stupidest sounding word. I, obviously thought it was “doily”. he swore it was “waffle”. at any rate, there are certain things I consciously avoid because their name sounds too weird or it just doesn’t make sense to me. sometimes I can do some research and find out the source and reasoning behind the name (read: google it or post the question on facebook) and get an answer satisfying enough to allow me to overlook the weird factor. sometimes not. but I digress… my point of all this is that the word “blog” was very nearly a deterring factor for me. I’m glad I didn’t let it bother me this one time.

in january of 2008 I had an 8 year old, a 2 year old, and a month old. needless to say, day to day life was a LOT different than it is now. those years were crazy. I think it’s just survival mode that gets you through it, and I know that I spent a LOT of time searching for my sanity.

blogging at that time was therapy. well, it still is, to some degree, but it was REALLY therapy then. I had several other friends in the same boat who also blogged, and we were like a little blog-based therapy group. it was awesome.

I didn’t post a lot of pictures at first. 1, because I didn’t take nearly as many pictures as I do now, and 2, because the uploading process and formatting process in blogger drove me batty. but I had plenty to say.

now a post without pictures is a rarity.

I use this blog less as a therapy tool and more as a creative outlet/family and friend update tool. and really, I just like to write. before I was a child development major, and a early childhood education major, and an undecided college drop-out, I was an english major. the BEST thing about this was (not the reading part, believe it or not) the writing! I got to write ALL. THE. TIME. essays, papers, poems, short stories, responses… writing. all the time. I LOVED it. (yeah, I know, that’s like everyone else’s least favorite part of college. I’m not normal.) and I miss it SO much! not enough to go back to school for it… but I really really miss writing. so, since nobody is paying me to write, and I’m bad at journaling when I know that I’m the only audience, I write here, to kind of get all that out. apparently I have a lot of words in me that start spewing forth whenever my fingers it the keyboard…

I’m also becoming a little more open to the idea of “a blog community” and connecting with people I don’t actually know. I’m still having a little bit of trouble with that factor. I feel a little weird learning details about people’s lives when I don’t actually know them and the idea of discussing people you mutually don’t know with friends is a little uncomfortable to me. it’s like reading about celebrities in gossip magazines or watching TMZ. I really cannot fathom why people want to know anything at all about the lives of movie or tv stars. I don’t understand the paparazzi’s existence or why people think that who someone is dating or what they ate for dinner or what any details of their private lives are is any of their business. at. all. to this day, I have no idea who the kardashians (or however you spell their name) are or why they are famous, and other than the curiosity of how they are so famous for simply being who they are and seemingly doing nothing other than being who they are has made them tabloid, tv show, and fashion line worthy… I don’t care! call me clueless. at any rate, I understand that bloggers are generally not tabloid-worthy types and that connecting with them via their blogs is not the same as stalking them, and that any information that is publicly posted on their blog is there for the taking, as opposed to stolen from them via a 4millionX zoom lens on a camera down the street by a crazy stalking reporter. and, as you can tell, I’m warming to the idea of link-ups and other such diversion in my own blog.

I’m writing a lot here, and I really have no idea where I’m going with this post. I need to shower and get myself and kids ready to leave for layla’s soccer game, so I guess this one’s done.

how’s that for random?