An excess of negativity

I have a confession to make. I hope you will hear it. Along with it comes an apology.

I have been feeling very convicted lately that my manner of speech and demeanor has been excessively negative. I could list off a number of excuses for why this may be. I'm sure you would nod your head and agree that all of them are perfectly legitimate reason for one to feel upset, angry, negative, pessimistic, etc.

But really, it is that I have allowed myself to become unfocused on the things that are true. I have allowed my heart and eyes to have been turned inward to my own reasoning of the things I see and experience around me and how I think they should be. I have not focused on Jesus and the promises of God's Word. I have neglected that relationship, due to a number of emotions and frustrations - not with God, but with what I have allowed to cloud my ideas about God - and my perception of things has been negatively impacted.

I have allowed myself to be negatively influenced by the negative speech and attitudes of others, and even worse, allowed my own negative speech attitude to negatively influence others.

For this, I hope you will forgive me.

My peace is grounded in the God of the universe and knowing that my place with him is secure, regardless of elections or wars or church politics or pandemics. And because of that, I can have hope and hopefully leave my negativity behind.

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rachel's continued ramblings

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