Friday, February 29, 2008

poop phobia

i'm going insane! my daughter is the most neurotic person i have ever met. not to mention aggrivating. we are now on day 3 of this particular round of what i have come to call 'the poop dance'. every 3 days (or so, depending on how long she is physically able to keep it up), we have to deal with layla's absolute insistance not to poop. when i tell people about this, they get all concerned and say that she's constipated and that we should give her miralax, because that's what worked for their kid when they were constipated. well, let me just clear this up. she's not constipated. it's not that she can't poop. it's that she won't. she flat out refuses to poop. eventually it does happen, obviously, but everytime it does, she freaks out, cries, and then apparently makes a mental note of what caused that to happen and then remembers not to do that next time. she used to say, 'i need to poop.' now, you could pay her a million dollars (or m&m's) and she WILL NOT admit that she needs to. it could be falling out of her butt and she will still say she doesn't have to if you ask her. a couple of times, we've been successful at getting her to 'push' while sitting on the toilet. so now she WILL NOT, under any circumstances, push while on the toilet. she has also now figured out that movement of any kind makes her feel like she has to poop (ie: playing, walking around), so now she will lay down. she will pee like 20 times in an hour, as if somehow if she pees enough, it will make up for the poop and then she won't have to do it. when she is walking around, she walks on her toes, i assume, because that makes it easier for her to squeeze her cheeks together and keep the poop in. she will dance back and forth from one foot to the other. she will do this dance in circles around her potty. and the worst, she will walk around making this super annoying, high pitched, panicky 'uh-uh-uh' sound that makes me want to scream or jump out of a very tall building. so, to date, these are layla's verbal indications that she needs to poop:
1. "i want you."
2. "i need you."
3. "i want a hug."
4. "i want to take a nap."
5. "i need to go pee."
6. "i want my underwear."
7. "i want my pants."

some kids do this because they don't want to poop on the potty. so they'll ask for a diaper and poop there. not layla. she doesn't want to poop at all. and by the way, the quickest way to stiffle a poop, is apparently to sit on a potty. the only way layla poops is if it literally falls out of her. she will not help it along and will do everything in her power to keep it from happening. oh, and in case you're wondering, she can't be bribed. not for all the tea in china. there is no incentive in the world that is convincing enough to get her to even try to do it. no way. so that's me venting. hopefully it will fall out soon (and hopefully on the potty) and then i won't have to deal with this again for 3 more days! oh yeah!

Monday, February 18, 2008

nice weather? is it really february?

so it completely cracks me up how people are around here when the sun comes out. and i'm not exempt from this either, so i'm making fun of myself as much as everyone else, although i'm not the lady in a tank top that i saw at the gas station. hello? 55 isn't exactly a tropical paradise! at any rate, pale, pasty seattleites crawled squinting out of the woodwork yesterday and could be found in all areas of 'the outdoors' working in their yards, biking, playing family games of football or frisbee, or doing what we did... playing at the park! after some yardwork, we met up with the hakalas at marymoor. it was awfully nice to be outside for a change and not dodging raindrops or shivering as you watch your breath rise like some sort of sacrificial incense to the gods of winter. shane and sean did some biking and tree climbing, while layla and robin enjoyed the playground. layla and i went on a fruitless search for ducks, but did see some well-fed park squirrels, about a million robins and then stomped on mole hills on the way back. we finished up with dinner at las margarita's which could have been better, but shane was a little under the weather (i think he was coming down with a cold), and layla had vetoed her afternoon nap, so she was very cranky. but it was still good - (and no puking this time, trudy!).

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

My House is a Mess!

so here's what i want to know... how do people have clean, tidy houses? and by people, i mean people with kids and no cleaning or landscaping service. in other words, people like me. i have this perpetual guilt complex about the state of my house. it's not even really that bad, but i have this (apparently unreal) fantasy about living in a house without crumbs on the carpet, clutter on every flat surface, clothes on bedroom floors, laundry half folded and not put away, and a garage that you can actually park your car in. i know these people exist, i just don't know how they do it. then i start to feel really guilty when i think of people like my great-grandmother who, at the turn of the century, was raising 8 kids on a farm in nebraska. she didn't have a washing machine or dishwasher. they didn't run out to the mall when they needed new clothes or bedding. they didn't have safeway.com delivering their groceries. they didn't have frozen costco meals for times when she 'forgot to cook dinner'. they didn't even have running water, i bet! well, i guess that means she didn't have bathrooms to clean. then again, i bet she didn't have a blog to update either.... it's official, i'm really just a lazy and incompetent homemaker! i guess it's not the end of the world. i just really would like to walk in one day and see everything clean and in it's place (i guess that would mean that everything actually had a place). i suppose if that actually happened i would just want to leave again, since living in your house is apparently what messes it up!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

vomit phobia

most people who know me relatively well are aware of my ridiculous fear of vomit. so essentially, the last year or so has been the embodiment of my worst nightmare. we have now embarked on stomach flu episode 4 of the last 13 months. is that not ridiculous? is that not excessive? what's the deal? should i be concerned? or maybe i'm just paying my dues. shane never had the stomach flu until he was 6, but now we've got it all the time. since may last year, he's now had it 3 times. between january and november of last year, layla had it 3 times, and now we're just waiting to see when she's going to come down with this latest strain. WHAT THE HECK! i never had it this often as a kid. maybe i was just lucky. i don't know. is this normal? how many times can you get this stuff in a certain amount of time before you should think that something is wrong? and how can you prevent it, if at all? i don't really think we have weak immune systems. the kids take vitamins, wash their hands before meals, eat decently, get enough sleep... what else can you do? i don't want to live in a bubble, but i don't want us to be sick all the time either. aaaaggghhhh!!!!

Monday, February 4, 2008

tag!

so this is mostly aimed at mary, but anyone can feel free to participate because i think it's kinda funny.

i got 'tagged' by innocently reading a friend's blog, so now i feel compelled to comply.

Find the closest 123-page or longer book to you and turn to page 123. (No cheating!) Find the first five sentences, then post the next three sentences.

okay, so the closest book would be the soundtransit 'ready to ride transit guide', but i'll spare you that... what's next... from 'child honoring: how to turn this world around', raffi cavoukian, sharna olfman; editors:

to illustrate this, here is one afrikan story. once upon a time there was an old man who wanted to have a monopoly of knowledge. he collected all the valuable knowledge, skills, and wisdom in the village, put them in a calabash (gourd), and tightly corked it.

well, that was a bit random, but i think that's the point. have fun!

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Cranky Old Ladies

i don't have any pictures to go with this, so it'll just be me ranting. i am totally baffled by how rude and inconsiderate some people can be, for no apparent reason. today during the sunday school hour, we and the hakalas went to tully's for our sunday morning ritual, 'heathen coffee'. we sip coffee and layla and robin play, micah usually sleeps. today when we were coming in, layla ran past an elderly lady who proceeded to start yelling at dave to 'control your child'. hello? do you have no experience at all with small children? so dave apologizes profusely to her and then conspicuously lectures layla about not running in there and watching out for people. then the lady comes over to me (we had unknowingly chosen a table right next to the one she was apparently sitting at, although she was standing elsewhere when layla ran past her). having just come in, micah was in his car seat, which i had set on the floor near our table while taking off my coat and layla's and getting her settled. so she walks right up to me, points at micah's car seat and says, 'you better get that out of there. you can't just put that in the middle of the aisles'. astonished, i muttered okay, and moved the seat closer to the table. gregg speaks up at this point and says that we'll take care of it. but she still wasn't done! then she says to him, 'well i don't want to fall over it and it's in the middle of the floor.' so i scooted it so close that it was touching the table, and gregg says, 'well now you know where it is, so it's okay.' and she gets all disgusted and finishes with, 'well i'm an old lady and i don't want to fall over.' so she goes and sits down and reads the paper until she leaves by walking out a completely different way that didn't go anywhere near micah's car seat. totally unbelievable. at any rate, i hope she feels better, having yelled at us, for no other reason that i can see, than for having children. good grief!

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